Tree trimmers or pine tree decorators

Tonight a tree was trimmed. The evening started off a little tense with a bit of Bill Bixby rage but things settled down quickly enough. Mouths were stuffed with food, carols were sung, dance routines were performed and a trumpet was tooted. Oh, and yes the tree was decorated. I'm looking at it right now and it is lovely. And deadly. It is covered from top to tails in strings of old-fashioned Christmas lights - lots of them. And I bought them at a thrift store. And they are very old. And they are verrrrry hot. So, I will have to be careful around my pretty little funeral pyre.

I am tired and I'm having a helluva time typing here. Dranked and smoked. Asthma doth protesteth and I think it's giving me acne.

Tell me, is "trim the tree" a foreign concept to you? Do you understand what I mean when I say I am 'trimming the tree"? Do you think I mean to take out shears and trim it down? Because I encountered 3 people today who thought just that. They figured "trim" meant cut and had never heard the phrase "trim the tree". I find this a little bit fucked.

Goodnight. Positive thoughts to Ben, please.