the inner workings of the inner workings
Things feel good and then things feel bad.
I've a lot to do - deadlines to meet... guests to entertain...etc. So, I'm busy and I move through my day easily enough. But then - at the oddest times - I feel a twinge that shuts me down. Yesterday, on the bus, it was the colour of a woman's hair that made my stomach flip- sending me grudgingly into my head and smack-dab into a sponge bath of hurt.
It's unnerving how intensely unhappy these episodes make me. I wonder how long it will take for the potency to fade. Time and new experiences will hopefully create distance. As usual there's no quick fix. I find this very annoying. I worry.
Uncle Colin's words haunt me: Don't get attached to the outcome.
I've a lot to do - deadlines to meet... guests to entertain...etc. So, I'm busy and I move through my day easily enough. But then - at the oddest times - I feel a twinge that shuts me down. Yesterday, on the bus, it was the colour of a woman's hair that made my stomach flip- sending me grudgingly into my head and smack-dab into a sponge bath of hurt.
It's unnerving how intensely unhappy these episodes make me. I wonder how long it will take for the potency to fade. Time and new experiences will hopefully create distance. As usual there's no quick fix. I find this very annoying. I worry.
Uncle Colin's words haunt me: Don't get attached to the outcome.
posted by ... at 1:38 PM
4 Comments:
"Sponge bath of hurt"
I like that.
You write in code. But someone's said the most important thing in a conversation is what's unsaid, or something like that.
Don't get attached to the cause.
om
Don't worry. That woman's hair couldn't hold a candle to yours. You can come out of your head now.
You write in code, but it's universal, IMHO. I like to think I understand this post. I know that stomach flip. For me, it never went away. You know what they say - once a stomach flipper always a stomach flipper.
Most important of all, do you really have an unlce Colin? Because I have an uncle Colin, too. Except, he never says much of anything. He lives in Guelph and he's sullen and kind of weird. But, I can see him agreeing with the attachement/outcome/cause thing.
-- Anonymous the 13th
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