Tuesday, January 30, 2007

next time don't ask me how i'm doing

Today I have a mad, sad, thinking-about-the-things-that-she-never-had (mmm, mmm, mmm - take it easy now) feeling going on.

And THE hugest anxiety pit is taking up some serious real estate in my stomach. I felt it expanding throughout the day and by 4:30 PM, I was pretty close to freaking out. After 7 hours in the "office" with no windows, no circulating air and nearly a dozen people - I had had enough.

I left only to endure perhaps the shittiest bus trip home. Ever. Crammed between two burly guys, I sat at the back of the bus - poaching myself in hate. Very unhealthy. I haven't been in a mood this black for quite a while. All this makes me feel very lonely and verrrrry sorry for myself, indeed.

And so I'm going to try to sleep it off. Since I've nothing nice to say, I will do like mother always said and shut the fuck up. No, she never ever said that, but it felt right put that in there.

I hate sleeping alone. But I do enjoy stretching out. I hate that I just went and found a silver-plated lining to the whole sleeping alone unpleasantness. Let the resignation begin.

I pity the fool who crosses my path before this little black ache works itself out.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

A) Why are you lonely? You'd think people would be beating down your door just to get a piece of you!

B) We all have days like this. I hope you do manage to 'sleep it off'

C) Why is a girl as smart and hot as you sleeping alone??

I'm glad to see you writing here again and I confess I enjoy your vitriol most of all.


p/s/ poaching in hate is brilliant

1/30/2007 10:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You mean the CBC can't even get you a window? Hard times. If I had been on your bus I would have leaned over and said "You're very sexy when you're angry." And then I would have to explain that while I'm a woman, I'm totally not gay except for that one time and that doesn't count.

F is right, no sleeping alone unless you want to! (Stretching out is awesome) It's 2007. It's a new year. Get what you want out of life and throw out the baby with the bathwater. Get yourself that dress from Urban Outfitters and rock it hard.

You don't have to cheer up. It's overrated, but you should have a little more fun.

When is your book coming out? And why aren't you running the Ceeb yet?


1/31/2007 12:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poached hate is brilliant.

Treat yourself to a chocolate smoothy from East is East. There's one that's opened up around there on Main and, oh 25th or so. Great food there.

And sleeping alone is good, like being alone. It happens but just think how much fun it is when it passes... :)

I think it's time for me to bite my tongue now.

1/31/2007 9:05 AM  
Anonymous n said...

I had that very same day last week. It must get passed around like some virus. Who's next...

2/01/2007 8:24 AM  
Blogger Kerry said...

sho nuff.

that day describes every day of my life. get over yourself aikman. i am the queen of despair. take a number and get in line. i will let you know when i give the act up.

in other news. i subscribe drinking more often. perhaps you, me, and AKA or is it now AKH?, should go for some liquer intake. lord knows she must know of some meat draw going on. holla.

2/01/2007 2:41 PM  
Blogger slagdump said...

Good God. Can I say fuck here? Oh. Just did. You are fucking awesome. I don't mean to say that your well worded misery makes me laugh...but well...it does. It reminds me of me. It made me very happy this morning after a little bitchpost of my own. Now I am feeling post-bitch, thanks to you. Keep it up you and you wil be a fucking star. I'd even buy your book with the last dollars in my magically disappearing bank account.

2/03/2007 8:14 AM  

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