Monday, August 03, 2009

Ew.

HOT SUMMER SEX [-- a truly terrible bit of writing full of very bad ideas and descriptions of lady bits that will make your skin crawl, highlighted and bolded. My gift to you.--slush]

by Pala Copeland & Al Link

Urban Male Magazine, Summer 1999

[REPUBLISHED WITHOUT PERMISSION, OBVIOUSLY]

It's summer, glorious summer and the heat in the air cranks up the heat in your groin. It seems that everywhere you look there's bared flesh - luscious flesh, firm flesh, tanned flesh. Flesh peeks out tantalizingly from the bottoms of buttock hugging short-shorts and spills provocatively over the top of breast caressing halter dresses. It calls to you from between tiny scraps of bikini "Touch me, kiss me, lick me, squeeze me."

Don't berate yourself as a lust-filled sex addict for continually wanting to "reach out and touch someone". You can blame part of that desire on your hormones, particularly oxytocin, a peptide that causes you to want touching and makes you feel really good when you get it so that you keep wanting more. Women, because of their high estrogen levels, are especially affected by oxytocin. That's one of the reasons they like to cuddle a lot. And generally the more a woman is stroked and cuddled the more easily she'll make the shift from sensual to sexual. If you want her to happily open her legs for you, be certain to give them some tender caresses first.

Satisfy your lady love's skin hunger by taking every opportunity you can to apply sunscreen, tanning lotion, after tan lotion and moisturizing cream to her sweet body. When you do, pay very close attention to the feel of her skin beneath your hands. Stroke with long, gentle movements letting her know with your touch that you adore her. Her skin will become satin smooth with all that creamy attention and you'll both reap the intimate benefits oxytocin brings. She can of course give your body the same loving care, whether you're aware of it or not you've got skin hunger too!

On those steamy sultry days when you only have to open your eyes to begin sweating take the sticky heat one step further with a truly erotic massage. Liberally oil both your bodies. Lie down - you may want to use a large plastic sheet, a tarp, or an old shower curtain for this - and slip slide all over each other using your entire bodies to massage and stimulate every succulent spot.

Or, for a sexy cool down nothing beats a masterfully wielded ice cube. With your darling's eyes closed, or better yet blindfolded, you can tease and please her through shivery strokes to her neck, nipples, and belly. Move at random over her body, or follow a slow set trail down to her honey pot. Keep her guessing by varying the time between those glacial touches and mix in kisses and sucks from your hot lips. Let icy drops fall haphazardly on different parts of her body. If you're not sure how to proceed rent 9 1/2 Weeks and watch Mickey Rourke drive Kim Basinger wild. Their ice cube scene will give you both plenty of inspiration.

1 Comments:

Blogger Pamela Stewart said...

an OLD shower curtain? You have GOT to be kidding me. People PAY for this magazine? Who? Tell me this!

11/16/2009 6:42 PM  

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