Friday, February 04, 2011

thursday

You know when you have a point? You may even be right and you feel pretty sure you should make your point because they say communication is essential...communication is key.

And so you go ahead and make that point. You're going to talk about your feelings because it is important to talk about one's feelings in life.

You have something to say.

You open your mouth and you hear your voice -- wheedling, whining -- and you want to really and truly stuff a sock in it. "It" being your mouth. Your trembling mouth from which your point is dribbling down your chin. It's really quite terrible. You can hear the tears and snot in your voice.

You are emotional.

You are tedious.

You wonder when did this happen? When did you become a person to be tolerated? When did this transition take place? Weren't you funny once? Wasn't there a time when others sought you out - maybe even desired you? Surely you were the apple of someone's eye and not so very long ago, right? Right?

Not this sad sack moaning about respect and self-esteem. What. A. Drag.

And since you cannot stuff a sock in it, you finish. No one feels better. Your point cost everyone a little something something. Time. Patience. You wipe your nose. An embrace. A truce. A bowl of chips.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Shane said...

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling down J-Diddy.

Things have a way of working out. You'll get there :)

2/15/2011 10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

perhaps you do have a legitimate point. perhaps the person you're talking to is not taking it seriously. perhaps you suffer from a tendency towards diffidence and self-doubt. perhaps it's time to doubt your self-doubt.

do not feel "ugly" because you want to stand up for yourself. maybe the "way" you are defending yourself is clumsy or not quite the way you'd like it to be, but it comes from a very noble place.

3/09/2011 4:34 PM  
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